A CATALOGUE OF TRAVELOGUES IN THE FORM OF A DUOLOGUE
IOYC: (Enters the Stage or some shit) Hey, hi! Guess what, I have just returned from a 'far-flung Clime', that Great and Noble Country of Italy, where I had some Ill adventures and Journalism of 'Local Interest Stories'.
'Great, now there are Kids in Italy, Spoiling it'
RAPT AUDIENCE MEMBER (ON STAGE): (WITH ENERGY) Holy fucking shit! I am blown away by that. Can I see some photos.
IOYC: Hell 'nay', because my camera fucked up and erased them all. First my Computer then my Camera, is there no end to my bullshit Woes of Technology.
Playwright's note / 'Serving Suggestion' - At this point some Chorus Members pass out in Symbolic Gesture of the Woes of Technology??
RAPT AUDIENCE MEMBER (ON STAGE): (WITH ENERGY) Tell me about it then -
(Pause)
RAPT AUDIENCE MEMBER (ON STAGE): (WITH ENERGY) - in Words.
Playwright's note - I cannot emphasize enough how fucking energetic that Rapt Audience Member (on Stage) is. You are a shit Director if the audience doesn't get it by this point - the dude is SO ENERGETIC!!
IOYC: Yae Verily I visited a Villa and a Market, and some other shit. The Villa was super Rustic, which 'clicked nicely' into my Lifetime Achivement on Rustic Houses - an example of Hidden Synergies. The Market was so fucking corrupted by the Mafia, those dudes were everywhere at that Market, others didn't see them but I saw them [DID THEY SEE ME ---> 'A PRICE ON MY HEAD'].
(MEGA Pause)
IOYC: Also there was an incident with 'the collected Works of Norwegian Folk Author Peter Christen Asbjornsen' which hasn't been resolved, Loss of Friendships etc.
RAPT AUDIENCE MEMBER (ON STAGE): (WITH ENERGY) That sounds pretty fucked up.
IOYC: Why don't you keep going on about it, and see what happens.
RAPT AUDIENCE MEMBER (ON STAGE): (WITH ENERGY) Oh Shit.
Playwright's note - The Rapt Audience Member can look approx 15% less rapt for this Line of Dialogue. Emphasis on Contrast!!
IOYC: (Exeunt)
(Another MEGA Pause)
RAPT AUDIENCE MEMBER (ON STAGE): (Exeunt)
'Great, now there are Kids in Italy, Spoiling it'
RAPT AUDIENCE MEMBER (ON STAGE): (WITH ENERGY) Holy fucking shit! I am blown away by that. Can I see some photos.
IOYC: Hell 'nay', because my camera fucked up and erased them all. First my Computer then my Camera, is there no end to my bullshit Woes of Technology.
Playwright's note / 'Serving Suggestion' - At this point some Chorus Members pass out in Symbolic Gesture of the Woes of Technology??
RAPT AUDIENCE MEMBER (ON STAGE): (WITH ENERGY) Tell me about it then -
(Pause)
RAPT AUDIENCE MEMBER (ON STAGE): (WITH ENERGY) - in Words.
Playwright's note - I cannot emphasize enough how fucking energetic that Rapt Audience Member (on Stage) is. You are a shit Director if the audience doesn't get it by this point - the dude is SO ENERGETIC!!
IOYC: Yae Verily I visited a Villa and a Market, and some other shit. The Villa was super Rustic, which 'clicked nicely' into my Lifetime Achivement on Rustic Houses - an example of Hidden Synergies. The Market was so fucking corrupted by the Mafia, those dudes were everywhere at that Market, others didn't see them but I saw them [DID THEY SEE ME ---> 'A PRICE ON MY HEAD'].
(MEGA Pause)
IOYC: Also there was an incident with 'the collected Works of Norwegian Folk Author Peter Christen Asbjornsen' which hasn't been resolved, Loss of Friendships etc.
RAPT AUDIENCE MEMBER (ON STAGE): (WITH ENERGY) That sounds pretty fucked up.
IOYC: Why don't you keep going on about it, and see what happens.
RAPT AUDIENCE MEMBER (ON STAGE): (WITH ENERGY) Oh Shit.
Playwright's note - The Rapt Audience Member can look approx 15% less rapt for this Line of Dialogue. Emphasis on Contrast!!
IOYC: (Exeunt)
(Another MEGA Pause)
RAPT AUDIENCE MEMBER (ON STAGE): (Exeunt)
6 Comments:
Huzzah (and other such words which sound more appropriate when being yelled during a fox hunt)!
Good to have you back, Mr IOYC x
Your brand of Journalism answers no questions but excites me like an agitated electron.
Let's have more Opinions regarding Issues, pronto (It.)!
welcome back, funny man.
where's my postcard?
How can I get in the audience for next time?
Is there a ticket office?
That was some funny stuff. Maybe (possibly) your best post/Journalism yet!
Dear Y'All
Thanks for your 'well-wishing'! It's good and stupid to be back in this Idiotic Land / adopted home etc.
You should see how ill my new Computer is. Even a Male Corpse would have a big Erection if he saw it ('Rigor Mortis' ??).
Dear Jobe,
You could so get a 'complimentary ticket' or some shit, if I can convince that box office --> all they care about is Profits, Profits and more Profits. Don't they care about Human Rights!
Kind Regards,
IOYC Cares About Human Rights (Not Profits)
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