Sunday, July 31, 2005

A BLAST FROM THE PAST

Over the last few days I've suddenly become probably the World's Foremost Expert on The Archaeology of History. History is such a growing field, there is so much new History being discovered every single day (b/c even more Past, etc). For example, did you know there is now a 1) History of the Pacific Ocean, 2) History of the Atlantic Ocean, 3) History of Great Tanks of 'WW2'??

"I'M IN A DAZE OF WONDERMENT"

F'real. What's left on my 'To Do List' is decide which area of History to specialise in to corner the Market and 'Make Out Like Bandits'. What I am thinking of right now is The History of Rustic Houses. Sounds fucked at first but cop this lesson plan:

Lesson One on The History of Rustic Houses
By IOYC, Massive Historian


'So Rustic'

1. Look at this dope Rustic House. Can you feel its History (in your Heart of Hearts)??

2. [IF YES]----------> Good! Next week: another Rustic House.

3. [IF NO]----------> Perhaps you should learn more about History and even read the fucking Reading Materials before coming here and wasting my oh so precious time you sycophant, GET OUT OF MY OFFICE!!

Now, please don't be 'yelling this from the rooftops' because the last thing I want is a proliferation of cheap imitators jumping on the Rustic House Bandwagon, ruining my livelihood and sending me to a fucked up Life of Poverty. Won't somebody please think of the Children!! (That I might have one day)

2 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Is that a rustic windmill?

5:25 AM  
Blogger Ben said...

It doesn't look anything like a windmill.

You seriously don't know shit, Jesus.

You make me want to sin.

9:12 AM  

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