Saturday, June 25, 2005

A TOTAL LACK OF RE: MORSE (CODE)

Brrrrukbukbuk!! In ancient times, dudes had to find a way to communicate without speaking in words, because they just didn't have a clue how to transmit that shit.

For hundreds of millions of years, people just were like 'WTF, will this ever end, fuck this Primitive lifestyle'. Into this enormous gap stepped the human mastermind of Dr Samuel Morse.


'I am Master of the Postal System and all other Systems'

And in one fell swoop, the dude completely invented a revolutionary Code, which was instantly called Morse Code. (Named after him). After that, life became so ill it was almost unbelievable that it was shit beforehand.

"AWESOME STORYTELLING, YOU'VE ALMOST BECOME 'FROM JOURNALIST TO NOVELIST'!"

Hahaha. Thanks, I was trying something new there!!

Anyway, let's stop this bullshit and get down to business. 'Pens Ready'? Morse Code basically consists of dots instead of words, letters, 'space bar' etc. How it works is you tap on something for the amount of dots you want and a Morse Code Translator will read out the results (ie message) in a stern voice. You merely have to listen to the Translator to become Totally Informed, in 'real time'.

It's bloody ingenious.

Nowadays Morse Code has almost fallen into disrepute because of its use in Wars and Secret Codes / Evil. It's not really fair because the Technology was NEVER intended to harm, only to help. Why won't they listen, ONLY TO HELP etc (Impression of Dr Samuel Morse). Also because everyone just talks on the Telephone (basically a 'copycat' invention) and Face to Face, totally disregarding Morse Code like so much filth. But I think it's still worthy of our recognition and UTMOST RESPECT.


'Anguish of Morseless World (Oil On Photo 1995)'

[Post Script: Dr Morse unfortunately was murdered by Brigands before he could read this article. My only hope that his Family Tree reads it and says 'Holy Shit, that sums up our Ancestor (and his achievements)'.]

12 Comments:

Blogger Dr Henrik Ziegler said...

.-. --- -.-. -.- .-.-.-

4:06 PM  
Blogger thr said...

Same went double for Nobel and his dynamite scene"
"Hey man, just use this blowing up dynamite shizzle for fishing, mining and interstellar travel"

"Sure alfie, sure"

1:23 AM  
Blogger Black Wind, Fire and Steel said...

Dear Doctor and Thomas Arrgh

1. Haha, it's like a secret fucking talk! Check this:

.... --- .-.. .-.. .- / ..--.. /

[!!!]

2. Dynamite is some fucked up shit. If it was never invented we would probably be living in Utopian Dreamworld right about now. I feel pretty conflicted as I love the Nobel Prize though (and Hope to Win it - ONE DAY!!)

3. I'm really interested in Researching about the Stock Market today! This could be the start of the biggest expose for a while, also Rich etc. Please order some 'choppers' to fly around in. 'There's some of the Villagers, could be Spies etc'.

Yours Sincerely,
IOYC for Wackenhut Corrections (a Group 4 Securitas Company)

4:09 AM  
Blogger Jess said...

... .... .. --.. --.. .-.. . .-.-.-

I can't wait till the day I become fluent in Morse code. I suspect it's a long way off though.

9:26 AM  
Blogger fluffy said...

-.-.----.-.-..-..-. .--.-.. -.-..--.-.- --.--.-.-.... -..... ..-.---..--.-...--..----.... ..-.--.----. .--......-.-..... .--. ---.--...-..--.

No need to know morse. Just go here.

6:23 PM  
Anonymous Deep (ly) Adverbal said...

I think while you guys are all basking in the Morse/AC/DC/sun glory you should spare a thought for the amphibious chap Claude Chappe who threw himself well into... well, a well, (time to 'INDVESTIGATE'!) at his hotel (I know it), what a way to go (out like that)!?! Now I know you're thinking "fair enough Holmes, I'd do that if I had such dry lips too, but" actually it was because he demonstrated the "practical Semaphore" which made the other ones look like jokes (ROFL!)!

He'd get dressed in his sailor's
uniform and be all like "Yo, let's P-Flag it up in here boys!!" and then he'd send his arms wailing about, which is technically known as the "Error (LH and RH raised and lowered together)". Another favourite of his was the 'Annul sign' (for no particular reason).

So I'd like to propose a post to Chappie - shall we never forget that two similar needles touched by the same lodestone are sympathetic.

6:26 PM  
Anonymous Deep West said...

Granola! I've just realised that my last post could be constru(silent "ct")ed as a big up for the cunning use of flags, which is totally bogeyman!!

4.e.g. when the "white people landed" and were all like "Oh, I'm 'regretful' that we just super seeded your communication methods of smoke signals - it was an occident, I swear (and shit)!"

Geez, talk about a tragedy/jukebox in Hesperia[n] - so long as you know I'm not down with that coz I'm on a higher level/piece out.

8:08 PM  
Blogger Adam said...

On that morse code translator website, is there also a translator for Deep? I'm feeling a little out of the loop.

8:49 PM  
Anonymous Deep Au Naturel said...

Feeling out of The Loop?!(incredulous)!? Jump back on it here dude, check out the biceps on those double arm semaphores and in no time you'll be all "Wow, I can't stop checking myself out now that I'm so 'train buff'".

No point looking at this shit on an atomica level Homes and being all "Alimentari my dear Whatson (TV tonight LOL!!) - I induce that he's punier than my buffed self with 'this double intender shit'" coz many famous people have said that already (eg Mahmoud "I'm mad in Ejad" Ahmadinejad in his victory speech).

I'm working on (no construction/DON'T WORRY) my English as some can attest to in writing, so no need to go running for C. "The Translator" P., OK?!? Is it just me, or is it getting hot in here!?

10:17 PM  
Blogger Black Wind, Fire and Steel said...

Dear Deep

That was a Dope Investigation into Train Buffing!! You're becoming pretty Journalistic right about now!! My only hope is that everything doesn't 'fuck up in a horrible mess' but with the amount of Praying going on everywhere this seems so unlikely to say the least (IS JESUS LISTENING TO US IN OUR THOUGHTS ETC).

Now I have to go deal with an Outbreak of Sectarian Violence, what a WASTE OF TIME but good for 'shaking things up a bit' in this 'federation of states' (loosely named!).

I'd also like to Shout Out all the people getting down with Morse Code. Please make sure it doesn't fall into the wrong hands. PLEASE I'M BEGGING YOU,

Yours Sincerely,
IOYC Sports Massage Clinic

3:07 AM  
Anonymous Jesus said...

.. .--- .-.-...--.--.--... .-.......-.-...-.--.

6:48 PM  
Blogger Adam said...

That Jesus is Great / 'not living in the past at all'.

I feel inspired by his morsecodery even though I don't understand it, the message is still clear.

9:11 PM  

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