Friday, June 03, 2005

A BIG WIN

Alright, listen up. After my encounter with Jeff Probst went straight up 'horribly awry', I thought I needed a challenge to re-boot my reputation / integrity as a Top Journalist.

So I decided to grow the World's Biggest Pumpkin.

"WTF, DO YOU KNOW THE FIRST THING ABOUT FARMING AND SPECIFICALLY PUMPKINS"

Ayo, check yourself, because I know a 'tonne' about them, after reading up on 'Pumpkin Nook', which is The Internet Shrine and Library for Pumpkins. Just take a look at the HARD FACTS on Pumpkin enthusiasts:

"Pumpkin lovers share some great personal traits. They, we tend to be :

- Fun loving
- Intelligent and inquisitive
- Respectful of nature.
- Friendly and helpful
- easy going
- charitable
- and much more"


'Hell Yes! Are we in the right place'

I purchased a Pumpkin seed from a dude, planted it in some Soil, and sat back for like half an hour to watch that shit grow OUT OF CONTROL.


'What a load of Shit'

At one point I was worried that my Pumpkin was just going to be too fucking huge for Reality and that people would think it was fake / a trick. Luckily, nobody even batted an eyelid except in shock at how big it was.

What the hell will I do next, who cares as I have got this title now: Grower Of World's Biggest Pumpkin.

It's an achievement that most people will never, ever have.

6 Comments:

Blogger Mr Jigglesworth said...

Your pumpkin brings all the boys into the yard - 'yo'
Damn right its bigger than theirs.

will you share the secret of your pumpkin growth insaness?

4:48 AM  
Blogger telf said...

ahh man

6:23 AM  
Blogger telf said...

whoops. my post wasnt finished. dont suppose you can do the same to mullies can you?

6:23 AM  
Blogger Black Wind, Fire and Steel said...

Dear Cats

I won't be sharing shit. That's how I stay number one in the field of Pumpkin Growing. I will give you a hint however.

HINT:

Yours sincerely,
IOYC Digital Solutions Pty Ltd

8:19 AM  
Blogger thr said...

fuck people are rude- when Newton like invented gravity no one went round giving him shit and asking for some, it was just there and accept in, yo.

SAME GOES FOR THE FUCKING BIG P-KIN!
thomasr

9:20 PM  
Blogger All the best to you! said...

Hi Black Wind, Fire and Steel! You have a great blog over here!
Please accept my compliments and wishes for your happiness and success!
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Have a great day!

12:50 AM  

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