Tuesday, May 31, 2005

YOU PROBABLY THINK YOU KNOW EVERYTHING*

*About Concrete

Well, I really doubt it.

Don't be offended / 'fucking cut up', because I felt the same way until I had a big meeting with every single member of the Concrete Society (U.K.).

These dudes know Concrete like the back of their hands, which isn't surprising as the backs of their hands are usually COVERED in Concrete (residue).


'Concrete Society Members / Application In Progress building a whole fucking Circle out of Concrete'

The most common topic of conversation at meetings of the Concrete Society is, what's the difference between Concrete and Cement. This is some controversial shit, as the difference hasn't been totally decided yet. The Concrete Society is roughly split into two camps on this issue:

1. Concrete Society cats that are down with Cement.
2. 'I HATE CEMENT, GET IT OUT OF THIS SOCIETY but sometimes it's alright / useful'.

You'd be surprised at how fired up people get over this. Once, an Application in Progress of the Concrete Society built a whole building out of Cement, unbeknownst to the Society. When they found out, the shit really hit the fan!! His Application was marked 'Rejected'.

"GOD DAMN, THESE DUDES LIVE, BREATHE AND EAT CONCRETE"

Check this shit, Phil Bates is so concerned with Decorative Concrete he spent hours posting this on the Concrete Society Message Board (internet):

"Decorative Concrete
I would think that this subject is of some interest for some but I think decorative concrete will die a suden death. its been around for a long time with no real stabilaty. Blocks are the safer bet as we know what to expect.
If any one can show me other wise then lets call it a day."

That's some heavy shit.

36 Comments:

Blogger roguemaze said...

I feel you may well be dissing the concrete world. I understand your frustrations in having to deal with the Cement v's concrete unions, but please spare a thought for those on the side of 'Lime' and 'Mortar'.

These groups are in dire straights. They are having trouble bringing back the 'Gangway' and the 'Gangplanks' to the shores of Botany Bay. And the good ship 'Raggamuffin' is in need of repair for she is lyin' at the quay. If this is not addressed also. There could be an uprising.

2:36 AM  
Blogger Black Wind, Fire and Steel said...

Dear Gent

These issues are pretty fucking important. I am trying to address them right now, but am just plain having trouble because my mind is full up with this Concrete / Cement shit.

Once it takes hold, you'll probably Die from Indecision. Be warned!

Best Wishes,
IOYC Management PLC

3:11 AM  
Blogger problematic said...

It's all about Hemp people.

7:56 PM  
Anonymous Horse Drawn Zepplin said...

Many years ago I amused my greenie friends by enrolling in, and getting a credit in the TAFE subject "Introduction to Concrete". This allowed me to hold forth such topics as the differences between Brighton Cement and Pozzolanic Cement.

I was very disappointed that the TAFE system changed the course structure and I never got to enrol in "Advanced Concrete"

11:34 PM  
Blogger Black Wind, Fire and Steel said...

Dear Horse

That is dead set the realest thing anyone has ever written on here (not including me). Are you fucking down with the Concrete Society or what? This could be the biggest Scoop in ages.

Yours Faithfully
IOYC Press Corps

2:58 AM  
Anonymous Jess said...

Well, if that impresses you - how about this. My father is the EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR of a Concrete Association. For real. And I did office work there and at the office next door which was the CEMENT association. Deadset, the pamphlets I have seen would blow your mind.

Also, I am not actually lying about this to impress you. I just have to be careful not to get too specific lest my posse of stalkers manage to sniff out my real life 'persona' x

8:14 PM  
Blogger Black Wind, Fire and Steel said...

Dear Jess

This is totally 'out of control'. I've had to re-read what you have said about 500 times just to let it sink in. I don't even know if this publication can handle that much realness without just plain fucking up from an OVERLOAD!!?

I could just think about how the CONCRETE dudes are next door to the CEMENT dudes for like, 68 weeks in a row without stopping. And at the end I'd be like 'That was the Best 68 Week period of my Life'.

In closing, HOLY SHIT.

Yours Sincerely,
IOYC International

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Blogger Black Wind, Fire and Steel said...

Dear Anonymous,

Holy Fuck! Are you a Journalist, because that shit is off the 'charts' - you've just got yourself a total Scoop! This is the kind of thing I would normally do a big report on except I don't want to step on other Journalists' turf (it's a Professional Ethic).

But just quickly:

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--Jennifer Wong


"FUCK YEAH!"

The only thing that pissed me off a little bit was, don't front on Beards.Org there is so much useful information on there that if you were growing a beard you'd be fucking INSANE not to read it most days.

Thanks Again,
IOYC Licencing and Reform Committee (As Established by the Acts Interpretation Act 1901)

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