EVEN THE ARMADILLOS GOT NECK PROTECTION
So one thing I've been doing lately is playing hella Darts. It's not a game you'd normally associate with, unless you are really into it. I'm at the point now where I can just do like 40 Bullseyes in a row. Most people will struggle to hit the fucking board, let alone post a massive score.
"I CAN'T EVEN HIT A WALL FROM 1 CM AWAY"
I don't know why this is. Perhaps the average co-ordination of the populace has dropped since Neanderthals had to throw Darts at Cows in order to survive. It's a pity as the sport itself is so refreshing, free from the commercialism that has ruined most pastimes. A typical press conference with a Darts practitioner would be like,
SPORT 'JOURNALIST': Who is your new Sponsorship, eh buddy?
NOBLE DARTS PRACTITIONER: If I had to dignify your query with an answer, my Learned Friend, I would suggest you take note of the blank canvas that is my uniform, my baggage located hence containing my Darts, (motions), mine coach who sits yonder - all of them festooned without logos of Sponsor, I Dart for the love of it which runs through the veins of my family.
SPORT 'JOURNALIST': I am retiring from my profession to become a priest.
Now if you'll excuse me I'm off to practice my technique, pretty disciplined as it is already basically perfect.
'These Darts are all that is left of my Once Proud Empire (and this folder)'
"I CAN'T EVEN HIT A WALL FROM 1 CM AWAY"
I don't know why this is. Perhaps the average co-ordination of the populace has dropped since Neanderthals had to throw Darts at Cows in order to survive. It's a pity as the sport itself is so refreshing, free from the commercialism that has ruined most pastimes. A typical press conference with a Darts practitioner would be like,
SPORT 'JOURNALIST': Who is your new Sponsorship, eh buddy?
NOBLE DARTS PRACTITIONER: If I had to dignify your query with an answer, my Learned Friend, I would suggest you take note of the blank canvas that is my uniform, my baggage located hence containing my Darts, (motions), mine coach who sits yonder - all of them festooned without logos of Sponsor, I Dart for the love of it which runs through the veins of my family.
SPORT 'JOURNALIST': I am retiring from my profession to become a priest.
Now if you'll excuse me I'm off to practice my technique, pretty disciplined as it is already basically perfect.
'These Darts are all that is left of my Once Proud Empire (and this folder)'
Labels: NOBLE SPORTS, SPORTS
5 Comments:
Dearest IOYC,
Yes!
Kind Regards,
Mr Mitch
That folder is hot
I hope Prince Charles can hit the (Duchess of Corn)wall from 1cm away. That would be cool.
PS - Australia Says No.
I dart for the love of it too, but I am still pretty shit at darts.
love does not = skill
This is a blatant and shameless attempt to draw my people to my
wondrous blog.
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