Sunday, September 10, 2006

MY IN DEPTH ROLODEX GOT JAPANESE CONNECTS

Well what do you fucking know I just received a telex from Japan informing me that I have inherited the Chrysanthemum Throne. I literally need to be in Tokyo in 45 mins to be Coronated as Imperial Majesty.

"ARE YOU GOING TO TAKE A PLANE OR SOME KIND OF FUCKING ROCKET TO GET THERE THAT FAST??"

To be honest that's the least of my worries at this point. I'm a bit ambivalent about the whole thing, as usual 'chronic indecisiveness is playing havoc with my life plans'. Shits me a bit, as this is a major decision, remain in current environs of 'Pretty chilled out in Sunny House nee Windmill' or 'Move to Japan and Rule ushering in a new era of Militant Imperialism based on Taoist Principles and Some Animism'. This isn't some shit like, 'what do I like more, iPod or iPod Nano'.


'Passport - check, Tickets - check, Babies - check'

To help me decide what to do I thought I would throw an I Ching, culturally insensitive but 'when in Rome' etc. I'm imagining this whole episode will be BLACKED OUT [no racist] of my official bio as Emperor.

Does anyone know how to interpret the results of an I Ching? No pressure, but the fate of entire nations is resting on this shit.

4 Comments:

Blogger Yubris said...

Not that I wanna keep getting all frist poster and shit, but can I just say Thank God you stepped in so they didn't need to change their traditional law and allow baby chrysanthemums to ascend.

The last thing we need right now is equal rights for those fucking flowers.

6:01 AM  
Blogger Adam said...

FREE I Ching Readings
The first and most popular I Ching site, offering FREE readings since 1993!
www.facade.com/iching/



Can you buy as much competence as this website provides for free?
No sir, you can not!

4:26 PM  
Blogger IOYC said...

Dear Adam,

I checked out the results on that I Ching Web Page, and I can't reveal too much, but let me just say, hint hint, buy some fucking shares.

"IN WHAT?"

Dude this is no time for fucking around.

Kind Regards,
IOYC Calamity Jane

11:22 PM  
Blogger Citizen j said...

As Presiential Hopeful elect and registrar en poplariae (i told somebody on some site, check google/it) of the term "Fudge Dragon©" i extend my warmest and so on to the Flower GodKing and his People's company. Unless you rolled 33, which i think is "bedwetting on mountain" and my campaign doesn't need that so much.

3:31 AM  

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