Sunday, May 15, 2005

YOU'RE NOT GOING TO BELIEVE THIS*

*because you don't understand it yet.

Ok, so I'm like a totally big Scientist, I use Science all the time to make graphs and a laboratory. But guess what - you can use Science to tell you how to perform every basic task (in the manner of a Guide) in order to totally revolutionise your life.

"WHAT THE SHIT!?"

It's called SCIENCEOLOGY and is apparently a Big Deal in some countries where heaps of people are right the fuck into science. In case you don't know what SCIENCEOLOGY is all about, who better to show you than me. Because I know shitloads about it now.

Peep this:

According to SCIENCEOLOGY, your life begins at a set of totally un-scientific crossroads.


"I could totally fuck this up if I choose the wrong one"

Most people do.

Which is almost a tragedy, because if you take a Science approach, it's pretty easy to see that:

1. Your body is made up of like a wavy line and shit.


"Dude, you are touching my wavy line and I am experiencing pleasure in my THETAN"

"WTF IS A THETAN"

Armed with this basic information, it's easy to lead a more Scientific life. You'll be totally equipped to take absolutely no shit and to tell people what you think:


"I AIN'T NO HOLLA BACK GIRL"


"YOU'VE RUINED OUR FAMILY WITH THIS PIANO SHIT"

I reckon it's tops.

5 Comments:

Blogger Jess said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Still laughing outloud at work. Fucking ace x

8:37 PM  
Anonymous Ferret said...

Piano-Dad has got the full Chameleon shit going on with that ball-kicking skivvy!

Way to camoflage, biatch!


Gil, what is it about your blog that makes me talk like a muther-fucking gansta?

Is it the muther-fucking?

1:53 AM  
Anonymous ferret, read his other commment, then said...

hey, it says my above comment was posted at like 1:00 am!

Where the fuck is it 1:00 am?

What is this? Moscow?

1:55 AM  
Blogger Black Wind, Fire and Steel said...

YOU COULD SAY THAT, MOTHERFUCKER!

6:01 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi - I trained in judo and karate for many years. I was looking for blogs having to do with judo and came across yours. Nice blog. I have my own have my own mixed style school now that offers most of the traditional judo techniques. Come have a look at it if you want.

7:44 PM  

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