I'M EVEN SCHOOLING SENIORS
For all his faults, Stephen Chumby sure doesn't dick about when it comes to turn-around time. Check this.
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Dear IOYC
RE: FW:
Thanks for your letter of even date. I have processed all the information therein.
Unfortunately I cannot grant you an Employment; no fucking way bro. Remember what happened last time I was your Line Manager - it almost cost me my career.
In brief:
1. You and Derek Fan sent out a package of documents to our biggest client and marked the envelope 'Dear Cock Blankets'. Upon opening said envelope our biggest client found only 300 copies of a single photocopied sheet reading 'I <3 YOU'. I don't think Fan was behind this - he's a good guy just a little lost in the world. I think you were behind it. I REALLY THINK THAT.
2. A pretty huge deal was going down and I gave you full responsibility for compiling the final piece (of the deal). Upon entering your Office at 11:59 pm with Closure due on the stroke of Midnight I discover you playing Tetris to a very advanced stage. Fair enough I was fucking mesmerised by the sheer speed with which the Tetris shapes descended that screen. They were a blur. It was actually beautiful.
2a. The point is I gave you that responsibility.
2b. You shirked it.
In summary please don't ever try to contact me again however McLimits sends his regards, specifically he wanted me to tell you 'Hey what the fuck's up IOYC!! Shit yeah cuz! Been a while has it fuck!!'.
With Warm Regards,
Stephen R. Chumby
Line Manager
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'Plenty to think about'
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Dear IOYC
RE: FW:
Thanks for your letter of even date. I have processed all the information therein.
Unfortunately I cannot grant you an Employment; no fucking way bro. Remember what happened last time I was your Line Manager - it almost cost me my career.
In brief:
1. You and Derek Fan sent out a package of documents to our biggest client and marked the envelope 'Dear Cock Blankets'. Upon opening said envelope our biggest client found only 300 copies of a single photocopied sheet reading 'I <3 YOU'. I don't think Fan was behind this - he's a good guy just a little lost in the world. I think you were behind it. I REALLY THINK THAT.
2. A pretty huge deal was going down and I gave you full responsibility for compiling the final piece (of the deal). Upon entering your Office at 11:59 pm with Closure due on the stroke of Midnight I discover you playing Tetris to a very advanced stage. Fair enough I was fucking mesmerised by the sheer speed with which the Tetris shapes descended that screen. They were a blur. It was actually beautiful.
2a. The point is I gave you that responsibility.
2b. You shirked it.
In summary please don't ever try to contact me again however McLimits sends his regards, specifically he wanted me to tell you 'Hey what the fuck's up IOYC!! Shit yeah cuz! Been a while has it fuck!!'.
With Warm Regards,
Stephen R. Chumby
Line Manager
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'Plenty to think about'
12 Comments:
oh they keep getting better and better. I REALLY THINK THAT. more please
Dear Black Wind and Others,
I've been working nonstop for 12 seconds to formulate this formula.
IOYC = unemployable.
You used to be cool man, now the whole world's GDP is like -7 because of you. Someone ought to knock your block off (giving you nowhere to put your windmill - that'll show you/slipknot/various hangeronerers).
Kind Regards,
Adam.
Dear IOYC
Where have you gone? please come back.
A. Non
Are ye still there?
please come back...
velvety choke.
Come back immediately.
dude
your later stuff hasn't been up to what i know you're capable of.
however, it's still the best blog on the web - now that one-track-scalesex bitch sold out to paper whores.
none the less, i am willing to send you free things, because i think one day you will become powerful and mask an aged me in your mighty force.
hit me up jonnytrig(at?)wanadoo.fr
x's? don't be gay.
I still check this blog at least once a week. Please come back.
Hello,
My name is Marion Bishop and I'm the webmaster of www.pinhole-glasses-direct.com
Would you be interested in writing an unbiased review of our product?
If you are, we can send you a free sample of the product which we would like you to review, and it is free of any shipping charges.
Feel free to contact me at pohsibnioram@gmail.com
Best regards,
Marion Bishop
Clearly IOYC is too busy reviewing pinhole glasses, to bother posting ever again. It's a sad time we live in.
Dear BWFS,
Is this cheese?
xoxonora
pleaseeee come back
god, where are you? everytime i refresh this page i get the same damn posting. seriously. come back to us. im not kidding. im gettin gupset......
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